does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.