You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
