we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
