he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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