Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
