I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize