He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
