How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I've blown a few things in my day
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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