well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
