I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
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