Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
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