no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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