thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
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You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
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He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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