it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He had one of those small greek statue penises
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
