he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
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I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
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As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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