Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
