But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
