This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize