thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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