Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
