We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I am never drinking with the goths again.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
