I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
