i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
sex in a hospital.. check
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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