Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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