I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
