I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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