I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
