Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You had me at "let me see your balls"
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
