Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
foreskin is a definite game changer
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
