We are two peas in an std pod
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Drunk is not a location!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
