youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize