sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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