So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
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