Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
she peed on how many people?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
