my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
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