I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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