are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could make wine with my vomit
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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