I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
