I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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