I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
