Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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