Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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