Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize