I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
how can u be prego again
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
