all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
