What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
