what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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