a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
