this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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