Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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