Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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